“Globe’s approach to fraud prevention is similar to how one might handle a stray cat – ignore it long enough, and maybe it will go away on its own”
What’s more secure: a bank vault or Globe Telecom’s mobile network?
If you answered “bank vault,” you might be surprised.
In a country where scams evolve faster than the latest TikTok trends, Globe Telecom has been caught red-handed once again, not by a tech-savvy hacker, but by a cat.
Or rather, a PhilHealth ID with a picture of a cat, to be precise.
It seems even a telecommunications giant can be outsmarted by a feline with a penchant for photo-bombing.
This delightful escapade unfolded recently when National Bureau of Investigation officials revealed to a bemused House of Representatives they were able to register a Globe SIM using an ID that not only flaunted a fake name but also a feline’s face.
That’s right, in the Philippines, your cat could have its very own phone number, complete with text and call capabilities—something most human beings can only dream of achieving in a reasonable amount of time.
But let’s back up a bit.
The rise of mobile scams in the Philippines is not just a problem; it’s practically a rite of passage.
From “Congratulations! You’ve won a free trip to Boracay!” to “Please send me load, I’m your long-lost cousin,” these scams are as much a part of daily life as rice and adobo.
And it’s not just individuals who are victims—entire families are left reeling, wondering if their newly adopted pet hamster has also secured a SIM in their name.
With scammers preying on the vulnerabilities of everyday Filipinos, you would think that our beloved telecom companies would take security a bit more seriously.
But fret not! The government, in a rare moment of foresight, passed a law to curb these scams by requiring SIM card registrations.
The law, heralded as the great shield against the deluge of fraud, promised protection and peace of mind.
Of course, it also promised that companies like Globe would actually develop systems to prevent a cat from owning a SIM card.
Unfortunately, much like a New Year’s resolution, the law’s good intentions quickly faltered in the face of real-world challenges, such as basic implementation.
Enter Globe Telecom, the colossus of connectivity.
With a market share that dwarfs its competitors, Globe enjoys a cozy relationship with the government, reminiscent of an old married couple who’ve long forgotten why they got together in the first place.
This influence is perhaps why Globe seems so nonchalant about little slip-ups—like the ability of a cat to gain access to their network.
After all, in the grand scheme of things, what’s one whiskered infiltrator among millions of subscribers?
When pressed by lawmakers about this glaring security flaw, Globe’s lawyer, Ariel Tubayan, offered a defense that can only be described as positively feline in its evasiveness.
He blamed a “time lag” in the system, noting the SIM would be deactivated within a certain “time period.”
Clearly, Globe’s approach to fraud prevention is similar to how one might handle a stray cat—ignore it long enough, and maybe it will go away on its own.
Yet, the NBI Cybercrime Division, under the new leadership of Director Jaime Santiago, wasn’t having it.
They pounced on Globe’s feeble excuse with the enthusiasm of a cat chasing a laser pointer, pointing out the fraudulent SIM was still active.
Kudos to Director Santiago for injecting some much-needed vigor into the NBI, especially after the somnolent reign of his predecessor, former Director Medardo G. De Lemos, whose tenure can best be described as a masterclass in strategic inaction.
But let’s not forget the true heroes of this tale—the members of the House of Representatives.
Their grilling of Globe’s representatives was a shining moment of parliamentary prowess, reminding us all why they are entrusted with the nation’s most pressing issues, like ensuring that cats don’t become mobile scammers.
One can only imagine the rousing cheers that must have echoed through the halls of Congress as they debated the merits of an ID system that can’t tell the difference between a human and a house pet.
So, what can we take away from this tale of tails?
Well, for one, it’s clear that Globe Telecom could benefit from a system that doesn’t need a “time lag” to realize that your new mobile customer is a cat.
They might also want to consider investing in some technology—like, say, a system that requires live selfies, optical character recognition, or even just a quick glance from a human being.
After all, if Smart Communications can manage it, surely Globe can too?
As for the NBI, I recommend they continue their crusade against fraudulent SIM registrations– perhaps expanding their scope to include the detection of other furry fraudsters, like dogs, hamsters, or the occasional iguana.
And to our esteemed lawmakers, I propose they draft new legislation requiring a national registry for all pets who wish to own a mobile device.
Next time you hear a purr from your phone, don’t assume it’s your cat.
It might just be Globe Telecom, trying to convince you that their security is as impenetrable as a colander.
After the recent incident with the PhilHealth ID with a cat photo, it’s clear Globe needs to do a lot more than just change their passwords.
It’s time for them to start taking security seriously.
